Funny Jokes: Mrs. Harris Meet Her Doctor

Old Mrs. Harris goes to the doctor with an embarrassing problem.

“I pass wind all the time” she says.
“It doesn't smell and it's silent but it's very uncomfortable. In fact, I've done it 20 times since coming in”.

The doc thinks for a minute then gives her a prescription.
He tells her “try taking these pills for a week then come back and see me”.

A week later, Mrs. Harris marches in, more embarrassed than ever.

“Doctor, I don't know what was in the pills but my problem is worse than ever - and now it stinks too!”

“Calm down!” says the doc.

“Now we've sorted out your sinuses, we'll see to your hearing”.

Funny Jokes: The secret to long life...

A doctor on his morning walk, noticed the old lady above,
sitting on her front step smoking a cigar, so he walked up to her and said,
"I couldn't help but notice how happy you look! What is your secret?"
"I smoke ten cigars a day," she said. "Before I go to bed, I smoke a nice big joint.
Apart from that, I drink a whole bottle of Jack Daniels every week, and eat only junk food.
On weekends, I pop pills, get laid, and don't exercise at all."

"That is absolutely amazing! How old are you?"

"Thirty-four," she replied.




"#&GK*%$IJFE))&%(_$#@%H "

Funny jokes: Just ten …

After months of ill heath, a man makes an appointment with his doctor for a full check-up.

The doctor brings out the results and says,
“I'm afraid I've got some very bad news. You're dying and you don't have much time left”.

The man looks shocked.
“Oh that's terrible! How long have I got?”

“Ten” replies the doctor.

“Ten?” the man asks. “Ten what? Months? Weeks? What on earth do you mean?”

The doctor looks at him sadly. “Nine... Eight...”